Goals?

When I first started this blog, I titled it "My Little Buttercup," with the hopes of having it be a place where I could go and talk about my little business. It became a place where I just show case my beautiful kids, and don't share much about myself (obviously the safe and easy route).

Not too long ago, I started my business (My Little Buttercup) making children's items and other odds and ends, and I really put everything on the back burner awaiting the birth of my son, and then taking care of a newborn.

Now that Charlie is 5 1/2 months, and Kaylee has started school, I am feeling the need for something greater in my business life. The push I guess to really put myself out there and take things to the next level. That is my goal I guess? Can goals be so vague?

To be honest, just writing this post makes me tingle a bit because I already am making myself feel more accountable for making something happen. What is that tingling? I know, its that four letter word that begins with an f... Okay, get your head out of the gutter, the other four letter word that begins with an f.... FEAR.
Fear of failure, fear of putting my thoughts and designs out there only to be put down, or worse, to have some non-creative, want-a-be copy my stuff and try to sell it as theirs (yes, sadly in the crafting world there are a lot of these type)!

What a crazy thing though; fear. Sometimes I watch the things my daughter Kaylee is afraid of and think, how simple fear is. Most of her fears were not learned, they were just gut feelings, that go away when she is comforted. My fear however is learned. Growing up I surrounded myself with such negative, backstabbing people, that I have learned not to put myself out there because I am nervous about what others will say and think. A characteristic I am really working on changing.

What I have come to realize recently is that the only person losing here is me. I have a lot of talents to contribute to the world, and I am just sitting back on my duff, waiting for things to fall in my lap. No more! I pushing forward. Taking a leap, and starting tonight, I am hoping this blog will be a place where I can document my experience.